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    Nature Hates Me... I'm About To Get Some (Far Cry Style) Proof

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    Paeter
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    Nature Hates Me... I'm About To Get Some (Far Cry Style) Proof

    Post  Paeter on April 24th 2018, 9:39 am

    I've mentioned a few times before, both here and on the podcast, that I really dislike nature, and nature seems to dislike me. It's like we have a peace treaty established where nature will stay out of my territory if I stay out of nature's territory.

    Usually I end up breaking the terms of the treaty, by going on some church camping trip or family function. But this week, nature is breaking the treaty.

    There is a bird in our neighborhood that is AGGRESSIVELY protecting something. A nest, itself, I don't know. But on Friday my wife discovered that every time she made the loop through our neighborhood and jogged past its tree, it began making lots of noise and swooping down in a locked-on attack formation behind her. I had just jogged that morning and not noticed anything, although I did have my headphones on loudly as usual, so I might have missed it.

    Yesterday, I noticed it. It was doing the same thing to me, locking on in formation behind me, gliding just a few feet behind my head, cawing intensely! I swerve, I cross the street, it stays with me until I am out of its territory. Then the same thing repeats the next time I pass. I did try waving it away, and that may have been what caused it to swerve off. But I was also close to being out of its zone at that time, so I can't be sure.

    Now, I'm confident this bird couldn't kill me. But I don't know how sharp that beak might be or if it might eventually go as far as attacking. I'm tempted to go jogging with a tennis racket, cuz I'm pretty sure I could wack that sucker. But that might be illegal, I don't know.

    I could call animal control, but they might just tell me its not serious enough for them to come out, and then I'd feel really stupid and wimpy.

    So instead... I'm going to have Holly make a video recording of the bird trying to attack me. (I'll be recording her too, as she makes her pass.) We usually don't jog/walk together, but today we'll stand united in the name of "possibly-getting-some-crazy-footage-for-exploitation-on-the-internet".

    I'm legit nervous. If you've played Far Cry 4, 5 or Primal, you've had those moments where an eagle crys out and then swoops down to attack. You hear the sound, turn and look up just in time to see wing-ed terror blot out the sun and swoop down upon you. That's what this feels like, but with a real beak attached to it.

    (Deep breath and exhale)

    Alright. Holly will be home and ready soon. Time to get changed and go play "Far Cry: Suburbia".

    Now where did I put my scoped sniper rifle...


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    Re: Nature Hates Me... I'm About To Get Some (Far Cry Style) Proof

    Post  Reed Benson on April 24th 2018, 9:40 pm

    Maybe you should call animal control just to ask if it's legal to wallop the bugger.
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    Re: Nature Hates Me... I'm About To Get Some (Far Cry Style) Proof

    Post  Paeter on April 25th 2018, 8:07 am

    Reed Benson wrote:Maybe you should call animal control just to ask if it's legal to wallop the bugger.

    That's a thought!

    We took some video yesterday, but there was a truck parked out front of the house and a worker in the yard. It still got into attack pattern on me, but much more briefly. The angle/distance of the shot also wasn't good.
    We're going to try again today...


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    Re: Nature Hates Me... I'm About To Get Some (Far Cry Style) Proof

    Post  AdamCollings on April 25th 2018, 7:31 pm

    This thread is entertaining Very Happy Sorry. It is quite wrong of me to be amused by your misfortune. But amused I am.
    I love your commentary on the tentative peace treaty between you and nature.

    Looking forward to seeing some video.

    Laughing
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    Paeter
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    Re: Nature Hates Me... I'm About To Get Some (Far Cry Style) Proof

    Post  Paeter on April 26th 2018, 9:33 am

    AdamCollings wrote:
    Looking forward to seeing some video.
    Laughing

    Video may not be possible. For two days now Holly and I have made a total of 4 attempts at getting footage. The first day a truck was parked out front that I think kept the bird away. The second day I think it behaved differently because there were two of us (we usually jog alone but I asked Holly to record me), and so it wasn't as aggressive.

    Holly suggested I just try to record the encounter myself, but then you won't be able to see me in the shot. Of course it WOULD look more like Far Cry potentially. So maybe that's worth a try.

    Oh crap, I'm nervous!


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    Re: Nature Hates Me... I'm About To Get Some (Far Cry Style) Proof

    Post  jorowi on April 26th 2018, 10:53 am

    Get one of those 360° cameras and mount it on your head.


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    Re: Nature Hates Me... I'm About To Get Some (Far Cry Style) Proof

    Post  ComiKate on May 17th 2018, 5:52 pm

    Well? How did this soap series end??
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    Re: Nature Hates Me... I'm About To Get Some (Far Cry Style) Proof

    Post  Paeter on May 18th 2018, 10:24 am

    ComiKate wrote:Well? How did this soap series end??

    Sorry for the lack of updates. I thought I might be able to get some footage. Alas, recording it myself was too shaky to catch anything, and having someone else record required them to be too far away to see anything either. (The bird does not "attack" when there is more than one person in the area.)

    And as of late last week, the bird has apparently moved on. Neither of us have seen any sign of him for the last 10 days.

    For now, it seems, the crisis has passed...


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    Re: Nature Hates Me... I'm About To Get Some (Far Cry Style) Proof

    Post  jorowi on May 18th 2018, 1:18 pm

    If you'd like, I'll come over dressed as a chicken and attack you while you run. Just pay for the airfare and I'm all over it!


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    Re: Nature Hates Me... I'm About To Get Some (Far Cry Style) Proof

    Post  Paeter on May 21st 2018, 11:15 am

    jorowi wrote:If you'd like, I'll come over dressed as a chicken and attack you while you run. Just pay for the airfare and I'm all over it!

    LOL of the morning! Thank you for that visual!

    Too bad I don't have a budget for that. Would be some killer youtube content.


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